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greenrick

Posts: 15 Member Since:11/25/09

#41 [url]

Nov 26 09 3:11 AM

Moth jokes

How do you make a butterfly?
Flick it out of the butter dish with a knife!

What is a myth?
A female moth!

What insect lives on nothing?
A moth, because it eats holes How do stones stop moths eating your clothes?
Because rolling stones gather no moths!

What do insects learn at school?
Mothmatics!

What's the biggest moth in the world?
A mammoth!

Why did the moth nibble a hole in the carpet?
He wanted to see the floor show!

What's pretty, delicate and carries a sub machine gun?
A killer butterfly!

Why was the moth so unpopular?
He kept picking holes in everything!

What do you get if you cross a firefly and a moth?
An insect who can find its way around a dark wardrobe!

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scorpion

Posts: 20 Member Since:04/14/10

#42 [url]

Apr 14 10 4:10 PM

A young boy and his dad went out fishing one fine morning. After a few quiet hours out in the boatthe boy became curious about the world around him. He looked up at his dad and asked "How do fish breathunder water?"
His dad thought about it for a moment, then replied, "I really don't know, son."
The boy sat quietly from another moment, then turned back to his dadand asked, "How does our boat float on the water?"
Once again his dad replied, "Don’t know, son."
Pondering his thoughts again, a short while later, the boy asks "Why is the sky blue?"
Again, his dad replied. "Don’t know, son."
The inquisitive boy, worried he was annoying his father, asks this time "Dad, do you mind that I'm asking you all of these questions?"
"Of course not son." replied his dad,  "How else are you ever going to learn anything?"

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warriorjames

Posts: 10 Member Since:02/16/09

#43 [url]

Feb 18 13 2:25 PM

Here's a sick, but good one.

There's a man holding auditions to try and find the next big person out there and be the one to get the big money. So far, the audition has been a flop. Then a 70-year old man comes in, and the man asks "OK, buddy...what's your big thing?"

The old man responds, "Well, I can sing out of my rectum."

The man giggles and looks at the elderly man, saying, "Yea right. You must have taken too many pills today."

Lone behold, the old man drops his pants and sings "rock the boat" straight out of his rear. The mans eyes widen and says "You're in. We'll make a fortune off of this whole thing."


Well, the first night for the old guy to sing comes. The place is completely sold out. The old man steps onto the stage and is given a standing ovation by the audience.  The old man then bows, drops his pants and takes a dump on the stage. The audience is instantly disgusted, and the man comes running out onto the stage.

"Hold on," the man yells, "I thought you could sing out of your rectum!!"

"I can," the old man said, "but first I have to clear my throat."

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warriorjames

Posts: 10 Member Since:02/16/09

#45 [url]

Jul 28 13 2:18 AM

So everybody is attending church. All is well; everyone is listening to the pastor preach. And then suddenly, out of nowhere, the devil shows up. Everyone goes running away from him...except for this one old man...probably in his early 80s. Confused, the devil looks him in the face.

"Hey...don't you know who I am?

"Yea.........you're the devil."

"Well...why aren't you afraid of me?"

"Afraid of you? Why should I be afraid of you...I've been married to your ex-wife for 60 years."

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